Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Home Sweet Home

We are finally home!!! Hallelujah! We were blessed by our close friends and family who drove out to San Francisco to give us a wonderful and emotional homecoming. I was so touched when we finally saw our friends and family, I had realized this crazy struggle of getting our children home, was finally over. We were on US soil, all four of us, safe and sound! Tears of joy streamed down my face as I saw the people who have prayed, hoped and cried with us during this journey. What a beautiful memory this will be for us to cherish! 



It's taken the kiddos a few days to adjust to their new life, but they have handled it like troopers!  Boy am I glad that Roman and I paid attention to the countless hours of adoption training and carefully read adoption books on bonding and making this transition easier for both us and the kids. These children (especially Katya) have been mostly confined to the same four walls, have only seem a few people and have lived with the same routine, day in and day out, for their entire lives.  They are now experiencing a lot of new senses, emotions, people, attention and places for the very first time, and it's easy in our excitement, to forget that this may be very confusing and overwhelming for them internally. The time change alone can be difficult for adults to transition to, but this is only one of the major life changes facing our children. We've tried to follow through with the recommendation of our social workers and lay low for awhile, giving the children a chance to process all the change before throwing them into more crowds of new people. This has been harder than we thought, as we've been traveling for a combination of eight weeks, so we've desperately wanted to spend some time catching up with friends and family.

Roman and I are still adjusting to a family of four. We are learning our new children's personalities, schedules, likes, dislikes, flaws, emotional state, health problems, etc. I think what is most surprising, is we are discovering so much about God's unconditional love. 

Let me tell you, it's true what they say, children from orphanages come with a whole host of problems, especially emotional and physical problems. Other parents may judge me for this, but I have no problem admitting my  kiddos are far from perfect. Andrey is extremely insecure and as impatient as a 16 year old girl waiting to get asked to prom. He is behind in math, reading and writing. We will have our hands full trying to get him caught up and ready for school. Katya is discovering when she cries, she gets a lot of attention, so I think she's made it a new hobby of hers. Katya is below the first percentile for weight and height for her age group, has a broken arm that was never fixed and suffers from severe vision problems (it must run in the family). Both children will require a lot of work and an incredible amount of patience. Regardless of how many imperfections, inadequacies, flaws or how many mistakes they make, I love them with every morsel of my being!!! I can't explain it, but from the moment I saw their photos, I knew they'd be broken, flawed and unwanted by others, but will be deeply loved by me. Does that sound familiar? Aren't we bruised, broken and flawed in so many ways, yet we are so deeply loved by our Father? I never understood how God could love me, unconditionally, even though I've messed up so many times, and I'm without a doubt unworthy of His love. 

God adopted us into His family. The best Father, the one who created all things, who is pure and perfect, has accepted us into His family! Wow! Have you ever thought about what an honor that is ? I am a daughter of the one true King! Maybe you have been rejected by this world, your peers, your family, or even your loved ones, but you will always be accepted by God. He looks at our flaws and sees our past, our hurts and our history. Despite of it all, God will show us great and unthinkable things we did not know. He will show us so many wonderful things and teach us so many valuables lessons, but most of all, he will love us with a love that we can't even grasp, an unconditional love that never fails. I am just learning to be a parent. I'm sure there will be times that I will fail and mess up, but I hope I can teach my children about a love that never falters or fails.