First Post: From a Broken Heart to an Open Heart

Four years ago, I received some life-changing news. My doctor told me I'd probably never be able to conceive on my own. As a 19 year old female, married for only one year I didn't know how I'd come home and share this devastating news with my husband. Although I was still somewhat hopeful that my doctor over-reacted and I could find a medical resolve to my problem, this news was crippling.

I've realized now that coping with infertility is really like coping with a loss. I use to think, how can I be so heartbroken about losing something I never had in the first place? What I had lost was hope for a beautiful future, filled with laughter, joy and love. I was overwhelmed with feelings of grief, denial, shock, anger, numbness, guilt and shame.  Now that I look back over my grieving process, I can't believe how much I've overcome and how God has taken the pieces of my broken heart and given me a hopeful open heart. 

I've decided to write about our experience with infertility because 1 in every 6 couples in the United States are struggling with infertility and I find that my community doesn't necessarily know how to cope with or support those who are coping with infertility.  I'd also like to share more about our journey  of adoption. 10 months ago my husband and I began the adoption process and we are currently on the wait list for a domestic infant adoption. We are so excited about what God has in store for our family, but it's been and going to be a roller-coaster of emotions and fears. Please join me for the ride! :)