Sunday, April 28, 2013


When Life Is Unfair 

As of April 28th,  my husband and I have been married for 6 years. As much as I  loved sitting back and pondering over the great years we've spent together and the beautiful relationship we have, I can't help but cringe at one somber reality. It has been almost six years since we first  started trying...  And childless for 6 long years! That's so crazy. Especially when the average time it takes a couple to conceive is 6 months. I know that life goes on and trust me... it's going on around me. I just don't feel like mine is. I know we have the adoption to look forward to but I feel like I'm stuck in time. Don't get me wrong, I've had a lot of wonderful memories and an abundance of blessings over the last 6 years, but just a mere 6 months ago I was preparing to live a life full of baby snuggles, burps and diaper changes and now I'm just stuck in time, while life around me is moving forward.  I know this is not encouraging or very helpful, but somedays it's how I truly feel. I am stuck in the same spot I was 6 years ago, just killing time. While everyone else has and is moving on. People are getting married, having children... one, two, and three. And we're still... just here.

It's so hard not to wonder why life is so unfair? I just recently heard my high school acquaintance had a second baby out of wedlock. She's not sure who the father is and isn't sure she'll be able to provide for both kiddos but she's going to "figure it out." Oh the irony! Life seems so unfair!

When I pray and think about this a bit more, I feel condemned. Truth be told, God doesn't owe me an explanation and never promised life would be fair. As a matter of fact, Jesus said in John 16:33  “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” The truth is we aren't entitled to have any of the great blessings we have in life, we are given all things by the grace of God and through his will alone. If you are like me and starting to realize how unfair the world is, remember God has and will continue to show grace to you, but it may be in different ways. You may not have it very easy in this world, but Our Lord has overcome the world! Fairness or justice isn't what should bring us joy or contentment, God's love and grace should fill the empty places in our soul and make us feel content and whole, regardless of which path we walk in life. By the way, I'm totally preaching to the choir here. I can use this reminder more than anyone. I hope it's helpful to you as well. 

Chin up, God has it all figured out, even if we don't!

7 comments:

  1. This post Is inspiring... as you have witnessed many of my own emotional meltdowns about life being unfair. Thank you for the kind reminder & your raw honesty. I love you :-)

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  2. All my posts are me preaching to the choir, but my hope is that if I can learn from them then so can others. Great post.

    Congrats on the 6 years!

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    1. Thanks! I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that way.

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  3. Krystyna and Roman, you are such an inspiration to me and my family. Seeing what you are going through shows me how strong and faithful you are to God. Both of you are so strong. I can’t imagine myself in your situation. I’d probably get discouraged, lose all hope, and finally give up. Seeing how you continue overcome your struggles shows me how great God is. I can’t count the times I prayed for your family, I can’t count the times my heart broke out for you while reading your posts. Thank you for being so open about your situation. I believe with all my heart that God is changing lives through your posts and your situation.
    Even when we think God is unfair to us, imagine what He has ALREADY done for us. “While we were still sinners, Christ loved us.” While we were so far away and so rebellious, Christ died for us. We are more wretched than we dare to believe and God is more gracious than we dare to hope. WOW. Isn’t that amazing? How beautiful is the grace of God towards us. Paul prays for God to heal him and God replies “My grace is enough”. He tells Paul that all Paul needs is the grace of God to live. May we understand the power of God’s grace in our lives and continue living in His grace every day of our lives.
    Krystyna, as Mother’s Day approaches I would like to wish you a Happy Mother’s Day. Your little girl is in best place she can be. She is in heaven with our Lord Jesus Christ rejoicing in His glory. May you be blessed and celebrate many more Mother’s Days filled with children laughter in your home. God has a plan to bless you. Your family is loved and always in our prayers.

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    1. Thank you SO much for your prayers and your encouraging comment! Blessings to you and yours as well.

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  4. Thank you for that. I find myself wanting to be a better person everytime I read your blog. I know it's easy to get discouraged and can't imagine how I would deal with this pain that you've dealt with along this journey to have a baby. Praying for you and your husband don't give up

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